Driving me crazy….

Getting out of the house and being out and about is no problem at all but what makes my heart skip a beat every time I start walking out the door is the concern over what is most likely going to happen on the drive.

I can’t think of anything more stressful than driving on a busy road with a crying (sometimes screaming, terribly upset) baby in the back. Ignoring it while I continue to drive on goes against everything inside me and every urge I have to nurture my baby. What I want to do is pull over, pull my little pickle out of his car seat and hold him in my arms as I wipe away his sad little tears. What is going through his mind as he starts to get upset… is it the driving motion? going backwards?? Is it uncomfortable? Or is he just lonely and feeling lost and abandoned? As I pull him out of the seat he looks at me with his sad, wet, relieved eyes – oh my gosh mummy, where were you, thank you for saving me.

He stops crying as soon as his little head leans onto my shoulder and the soft whimpers continue as though he is telling me the story of his terrible ordeal. I love that there is a possibility that he feels I might have saved him from this horrible feeling, but I hope that he doesn’t remember that it was me who put him in there.

DSC_0452

The car seats and the positioning were certainly not designed with mums in mind – although I am in full support of having my babe as safe as possible whilst driving, I cant help but wonder if this whole situation is as dangerous as it could possibly be for me (and other cars on the road) as my heart starts to pound and I find myself reaching back to find his hand or the top of his head whilst promising him that we are ‘nearly there’ or “I will stop as soon as I can” and letting my 100% focus on the road lapse a little… or a lot.

The only time I can get from A to B without the tears is if I can put him into the seat with a clean nappy, ‘milk drunk’ and drowsy so that he doesn’t notice that I am putting him into the seat… sometimes even with the dummy in his mouth so that he might drift off to sleep.

It only works when he's sleeping....
It only works when he’s sleeping….

The catch with this is if he drops the dummy on route to our destination…. It starts with little noises “mum, I dropped the dummy, can you get it please”… and escalates slowly to “mum, mum, mum, I dropped the dummy… PLEEEEEASE can you get it… . NOW”…. Until it becomes “ OMFG, I LOST THE DUMMY, IM DYING, IM ALONE, ABANDONED AND BEING IGNORED”….. as he catches his breath trying to breathe between cries, the tears start to stream down my face and I find myself pulling into the next available driveway, carpark or side street.

Has this happened to you? What do you do? Any tips you can share with me would be greatly appreciated!!

Maybe we need to start taking the bus?

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One Comment Add yours

  1. Irene says:

    Yes I remembered this so well, although my children are adults now with children of their own, I still remember how difficult and stressful those car journey were, a baby crying and driving in the free way, and the baby being so far away that you can’t touch him and he can’t see you. I think that our baby’s feel alone, abandoned and vulnerable and no talking or pacifier or bottle will change that.
    The only solution in my opinion is to demand a better car seat designed with baby & mother in mind. mums around the wotld should unite in achieving this goal to allow mums and babs to enjoy tigether a trip in the car.

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